Guys forgive and forget. Girls hold grudges forever.
I’ve just had an earful of this crap because I don’t want to go to the pub on a Saturday night with the boys brother and bitchface girlfriend. Long story short, these are the dicks that stayed with us and then caused vindictive shit afterwards. So, why would I want to ruin my night by having to play happy families and fight of the urge to smack a bitch up.
I get why the boy is feeling frustrated – he wants to see his brother and feels stuck because of the feud going on. I told him he can go if he likes, but nope he can’t go cos he will be a third wheel and it would be obvious why I’m not there.
Now, I’m not the kind of person who can just pretend to have different feelings and shit. I’m a terrible liar and terrible actor, which is why I never do either. I’m pretty honest (maybe verging on the edge of crass but whatever, I don’t play mind games), and will be honest about how I’m feeling. And how I’m feeling now is I’m not ready to play happy families with that fecal colliform of a bitch.
That’s not to say that I “hold grudges forever”. No, I don’t like to hold on to anger. Saying that though, I need time for the feelings of burn to subside. And time doesn’t constitute a month, like the boy irrationally expects. Emotions and shit are stupid things that just need to go at their own pace. As much as I wish I could expedite the healing process I just can’t. If she apologised then maybe we would get somewhere, but because she’s a child and that will never happen I have to slowly rely on myself to get over it.
Him basically telling me to get over is the same as someone telling you to “just get over” a broken heart. We all know that’s not how the cookie crumbles.
So anyway, now I’m stuck in between a rock and a hard place or some kinda analogy like that. I wish I could be the “bigger person” for the boy’s sake so he feels better about it all, but on the same hand I can’t betray my own feelings.
So I don’t know, maybe I am holding a grudge like he says. But I am trying my hardest to let go of it at the same time. You just can’t rush me – just like you can’t lead a horse to water and make it drink or some shit like that.
Am I being unreasonable?