Things I don’t give a shit about but probably should

November 21, 2014 by nonsenseunicorn 13 Comments

I’m a naturally apathetic person.  A regular utterance from my lazy lips on a daily basis would be “meh”.

A whole lotta stuff to me is a whole lotta meh.  And so,  there are some things in this life that I just don’t really care about,  where many others seem to take issue.  I don’t know if this makes me inherently lazy or solidly depressed,  but …. meh.

Here you have it:  things I don’t give a shit about but probably should

Getting scratches on my car

Scratches and dints on my car just don’t get my anger girdle going.  Even though I finally drive a car that wasn’t made in the 80s or 90s,  I still can’t give a shit when I notice a ding.  As long as the insides work, meh.

Getting my period

Some girls get all high horsey and shit when the red river flows:

“Oh it’s that time of the month,  I feel like shit, whinge whinge whinge,  periods suck balls”.

“Treat me extra special,  aunt flow has arrived”.

“Get me a rag on a stick,  I’m on my period and that automatically – for some irrational reason – means you need to treat me like a princess!”

I’ve never really found it a big deal,  nor felt the need to ever whinge about it or use it to my advantage.  I just.  Don’t.  Care.  I can’t really even remember my first time I just don’t give a shit that much,  but I’m pretty sure it went something like, “oi mum,  I’m bleedin and shit, pass me one of those pads will ya?” (okay maybe I didn’t really talk like that when I was a teen, but whatevs).

Periods.  Don’t give a shit.

Stop being pussies, ladies.

Folding Clothes

Nope.  Ain’t nobody got time for that.  Buy your clothes strategically so they don’t crinkle,  roll em in a ball and chuck em in the basket.  Done.  The boy has to have his clothes perfectly folded,  but meh I find it such a waste of time and effort.

Unless you have one of those folding mechanisms.  Then maybe I would attempt it for the lols.

This shit exists yo!

Being Nice to People who don’t like me

You don’t like me and I don’t like you.  Why waste energy on these types of mofos?  I guess I should try and be a little more diplomatic when dealing with people I don’t like and not tell them to go slit their throat (thank you School Reunion),  but I just don’t give a shit.

On many occasion in my life I’ve gotten myself into trouble,  or been painted as the bitch,  cos I won’t shy away from telling a dick knob where he can shove his head (happens to be where a sun don’t shines),  where other friends will smile and nod and be nice in fear of being rude.  But MEH.

Expiry Dates

If it doesn’t smell,  isn’t slimey,  and hasn’t been sitting there for a ludicrously long time,  I’ll probably eat or drink it.

The boy will throw milk out on the day it says it expires.  But I’ve totally had it two days after cos it’s still been FINE.

Pretty sure medieval plebeians didn’t care so much,  so neither do I. Meh.

Aaaaand I’ll still drink it. Boom.

Clothing Brands and Designer Labels

Pfft I’m not going to spend billions of dollars on a stupid handbag when I can get one that’s just as cool for $50.

Designer labels are just a stupid status label and I just don’t give a shit.

Oh,  you spent $2000 on a Prada bag?  Yeah,  well I’m taking that money and going to JAPAN INSTEAD YOU SUPERFICIAL PERSON YOU.

Meh.  Imma sit her in my $10 pants and be happy.

I don’t WANT to, you smell like moth balls.

And there’s probably alot of things I can add to this,  but I’ve stopped giving a shit about this and wanna watch a movie now so ……. something something five dollars? Get outta here!

Coming up soon when I feel like it but probably won’t:  Things I give too much of a shit about

Nonsense Unicorn