Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

Rambling Goat and Nonsense Unicorn present… The Awesome Person's Guide to Life


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Forever Young

I received a text last night about another friend expecting a baby. I think that now officially moves the ratio of my friends closer to the motherhood side and I am the outlier . Eww.


I am officially at that age where all my friends are getting married and having babies, and I’m just here roller skating, looking at BJD dolls and planning which gaming console I’m going to buy next.

I don’t care if I’m 30, im too damn young to be needing all of this adult bullshit.


When I received the text last night, instead of feeling happy for my friend I started to get that gut wrenching burn of anxiety inside my chest. I closed my eyes and tried not to panic about the perpetual paradox that I live in.

Why don’t I want the same things as everyone else? Am I unknowingly a sociopath or something?

I don’t want babies now, but I also don’t want to have babies when I’m older.

I don’t want to get married, but I don’t want babies out of wedlock.

All these thoughts, wishing I could just follow the status quo. But I don’t freaking want to.

And I know that blah blah when the time is right, but you can’t argue with biology. And what if I end up having wary menopause, or fertility problems, I’m already 7 years out of my breeding prime, am I really meant to be thinking of re-spawning now?

When do I draw the line and make the decision to take a leap into adulthood?

When do I have to grow up?


Nonsense Unicorn