Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

Rambling Goat and Nonsense Unicorn present… The Awesome Person's Guide to Life

Forever Young

8 Comments

I received a text last night about another friend expecting a baby. I think that now officially moves the ratio of my friends closer to the motherhood side and I am the outlier . Eww.


I am officially at that age where all my friends are getting married and having babies, and I’m just here roller skating, looking at BJD dolls and planning which gaming console I’m going to buy next.

I don’t care if I’m 30, im too damn young to be needing all of this adult bullshit.


When I received the text last night, instead of feeling happy for my friend I started to get that gut wrenching burn of anxiety inside my chest. I closed my eyes and tried not to panic about the perpetual paradox that I live in.

Why don’t I want the same things as everyone else? Am I unknowingly a sociopath or something?

I don’t want babies now, but I also don’t want to have babies when I’m older.

I don’t want to get married, but I don’t want babies out of wedlock.

All these thoughts, wishing I could just follow the status quo. But I don’t freaking want to.

And I know that blah blah when the time is right, but you can’t argue with biology. And what if I end up having wary menopause, or fertility problems, I’m already 7 years out of my breeding prime, am I really meant to be thinking of re-spawning now?

When do I draw the line and make the decision to take a leap into adulthood?

When do I have to grow up?


Nonsense Unicorn

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Author: nonsenseunicorn

Just another twenty-something year old making sense out of madness. Boom.

8 thoughts on “Forever Young

  1. The whole ‘adulthood’ thing is stupid. Very few are actually qualified to be parents. Most people end up divorced and their kids have issues and it turns out to be more a mess than anything else. Just be yourself, and if anything not only don’t care about what other people do you should also be proud of being different!

    That said, best of luck to your friend~

  2. If you don’t want to have babies you don’t have to. One day you might, but it might never happen.
    xo

    • You are quite right. Just need to drown out the moans coming from the status quo about it!

      • I don’t know you well enough so please take this as coming from a good place, but the one thing I was going to ask, when it comes to the “don’t want to be adulting” kind of thoughts… could it be fear of failure speaking at any level? I told put not wanting kids in that category by the way. They are amazing but I wouldn’t recommend it unless you really want one!

        • I get what you’re saying! I am honestly not sure…. I think there is an element of me not seeing myself as being good enough for someone to marry me, or that I would fuck up a kid, but the stronger feeling I have is – well, actually it’s the lack of strong feeling about it. I don’t have the passion for these adult things, I’m more excited for the next comic con than the prospect of what society deems a future (ie house, husband, kid). Don’t know if the strong want for that stuff will ever come.

  3. I also feel unusual compared to most 34 year olds. People can’t understand why I don’t want any more babies. I need more – travel, lie ins, eating beans on toast for a week. All because I can.

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