Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

Rambling Goat and Nonsense Unicorn present… The Awesome Person's Guide to Life

Becoming a Seductress 101


Women tend to forget what they’re capable of sometimes. We hold a ton of power in how sex pans out – the effort you give out to seduce beforehand is somewhat indicative of the sex that will follow.

I say somewhat because there’s obviously other factors like experience, confidence, skill, sexual chemistry, relationship styles etc that affect this. For the sake of keeping the post a reasonable size though, lets keep it super basic and generalised:

No seduction, ‘meh’ attitude -> Possible disinterested partner.
Becoming a sexy tease seduction goddess -> Chances are you’re going to be mauled.

Ok so not everyone thinks they’re capable of seducing people but consider this a nudge of encouragement in the right direction. You are totally capable of becoming the master of tease and seduction, you just need to put the effort in. It’s so worth the effort to hear an audible moan or grunt of sexual approval. Knowing that they want you so badly that they cant help but make a noise? Daaamn thats sexy. And also a massive confidence boost 😉

And for you hetero men, before I lose your interest in this post, remember:
a) To let your missus know that being seduced is very sexy (we don’t always need words, a growl/moan/grunt or obvious hard-on is quite ok). We need to be encouraged by your reaction to do it again sometime.
b) It doesn’t just have to be a woman doing the seducing. Dressing smart, being clean and smelling good will all be steps in the right direction. As will using a vacuum (plenty of us find men doing housework sexy reow!! 😉 ).

Let’s start with a question for both genders – have you ever watched a David Attenborough doco and seen birds doing a mating dance?

Now think – do YOU do a mating dance? Wearing tracky dacks on the couch and spilling food down your front is not a mating dance, just so we’re clear 😛 Most animals have a certain way of attracting a mate and we too can do a ‘mating dance’.

So how to switch the seduction goddess on?
*Shower – Use nice-smelling body lotion/soap/shampoo/conditioner (fruity, vanilla etc). There’s intimate wash gels for your region that keep the pH levels where they should be and keep you smelling good down south.
*Hair removal – ok some men like hair (I was talking to someone today who loves long armpit hair) but if your partner doesn’t, get out the hedging shears and clip that wild beast back.
*Lingerie – we don’t think we look all that fantastic in it but on face value, it is designed to look good. And it does. Ask your partner if you don’t believe me 😛
*Heels – There’s just something about them that makes us feel womanly and sexy, right?
*Dimmed lights – did everyone just get a bit sexier? Bright lights make me think I’m in a club at 3am when the ‘ugly’ lights come on. Not cool bro, not cool.

This will all help with an important (but not actually *necessary*) aspect:
As will this.

If you’ve now got this part sorted and want to move to the next step, let’s just say ‘Becoming a Seductress 201’ involves toys and/or kink. How about putting a blindfold on your partner? Or get out some whipped cream.

Explore and enjoy you sexy seductresses!

Rambling Goat


Author: ramblingg0at

Life loves to set me up for its own entertainment. But instead of me hiding these awkward moments, I plan on sharing them for my own (and possibly your) amusement. Now who's laughing, life?

3 thoughts on “Becoming a Seductress 101

  1. I like how matter-of-factly you approach this. So many of us have crippling insecurities about our seductiveness/”sexual prowess” (and, really, deeper personal worth) and sometimes just some superficial changes can go a really long way. For better or for worse, the heady feeling you get knowing that you are able to kindle a flame in someone is addictive as fuck because, for a large bunch of us, an erection/wet pussy is undeniable proof that we are awesome at least in that moment.

  2. Pingback: Dick Phobia | Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

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