Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

Rambling Goat and Nonsense Unicorn present… The Awesome Person's Guide to Life

Cockblocked by my BF


It was at bf’s brother’s bday party. I happened to be hanging out in the front yard with all the family friends and we managed to get the door-bitch duties, with the other brothers being security. I’d never been door-bitch before so had my list and was excited πŸ˜€ It was a good group of peeps and everyone was in a happy mood.

The first group of people turned up and some of the people weren’t on the list. Uhhhh now what? My dragons vs vaginas friend (who will now be known as Glam) took the lead “stand to the side, birthday boy will come out soon and see you but chances are if you’re not on the list, you’re not getting in”. Wooo fiesty! The bunch of girls (struggling on the gravel in heels and tight dresses) called a taxi and left.

Its funny, my first thought was ‘hot chics, the boys would have let them in anyway..’ but I was impressed with her feminist ways. I’d had a party when I was about 16 that was open house while my folks were away. My brother was meant to be security but when it reached the maximum my house could hold comfortably, he kept letting in hot girls. It ended up being broken up by police (the neighbour called them) and the party had gone from 0 to 200+ people in 2 hours.

So Glam was a good door-bitch. I’m too nice but she had the feistiness to keep us doing the job properly. The other door-bitch was doing a good job too. We started getting drunk and having fun with it. Instead of stamping peoples hands or handing out wristbands, I was armed with a permanent texta and was drawing pretty butterflies on the hands of all the superficial gym-junkie guys hahaha πŸ˜›

Glam had told me we were going to get ‘white girl wasted’ leading up to the party so I took that as interest. She’s bf’s brother’s friend and we’re pretty flirty with each other. I hoped it would be straightforward – I’d get these brats all into the party, close up shop and take her inside to maul her.

Then drugs started working their way around. Ecstacy. Uggghhh ok that was me 11 years ago, but certainly not now.

When I was 17 I would take pills and go to ‘all ages’ raves because I wanted to go out but our legal drinking age is 18. Oh yeah, I found a loop hole πŸ˜€ And my last year I highschool probably wasn’t my finest in regards to actually trying but meh, I had fun and I have plenty of stories.

But yeah, I’ve moved on from drugs. Clearly I’m an alcho now πŸ˜› I do still take some veryyyy *occasionally* but let me tell you – I haven’t paid for drugs in like 5 years. Its a lot harder to say no when they’re free.. And because they’re free I generally don’t take much (am I helping my cause here?).

So Glam and I were getting a bit frisky. There were cuddles, hand holding, sitting on each others laps and neck biting again (are we vampires? Haha). I didn’t feel like doing ecstacy so only took a half of a pill (enough to keep me awake and frisky for Glam but not off my face) and the rest of the door bitches ended up compensating for my lack of enthusiasm. Which resulted in one guy sitting there staring for hours, and bf introducing me to his friend’s wife at least 8 times in a row.

Most of the partygoers were inside at this point. Time to sneak Glam away!

Then bf’s dad saw bf hanging out the front being off his face and told me to take him in for water. I’m lacking in the sympathy department for shit like this because for someone who doesn’t really do ecstacy, why would you take more than you could handle? Grrr use your brains people! He could have sold his leftovers. I was just about to take Glam away.. 😦

So we ended up back in his man cave/room, I just blatantly kicked out the drunk idiots in there because they were annoying and it was pretty late, chucked bf on the bed, got him water, then laid down next to him checking if he was ok. Glam came in and laid next to me and cuddled and another friend came in and laid with us. Not sure what bf was doing because he had 3 girls cuddled up to him, giggling and chatting for a good half an hour.

I’d even taken my pants off because I had a sunburnt side of butt from kayaking and it was starting to hurt. A couple of guys wandered in, saw us girls laying there all cuddled up, with me in my undies being the closest to the door, said “woah!”, grinned, quickly grabbed what they were looking for and exited.

Well I *wish* it was an orgy but with Glam gently stroking me and running her hands through my hair, I fell asleep. Its sad to admit, but its not the first time my body has chosen sleep over sex with a hot girl. My bad.

I woke up briefly and noticed she was putting soothing gel on my sunburnt butt and the room was full of people casually drinking.

I woke up again later and everyone was gone except that staring guy from out the front earlier was passed out on the couch and bf was wandering around with a drink. Of course he was feeling fine now, that’s so typical grrrr!

So in conclusion, after looking after bf wigging out from too many drugs, I got exhausted and slept instead of kicking everyone out, locking the door and ravaging Miss Glam on the bed. Sigh. Bf had even told me we could play on his bed, how nice πŸ™‚

But as it turned out, sex with Glam, fail 2/2.

Rambling Goat

Footnote: The next day a group of us watched a movie and Glam and I ended up cuddled up on the couch together. I’m sure we looked all cutesy and I reallyyyy shouldn’t be so cutesy because I want to have some kinky play with her but damn you girls, you make me turn to mush! Treating a potential fwb as a potential gf – this whole thing could end up blowing up in my face :/


Author: ramblingg0at

Life loves to set me up for its own entertainment. But instead of me hiding these awkward moments, I plan on sharing them for my own (and possibly your) amusement. Now who's laughing, life?

4 thoughts on “Cockblocked by my BF

  1. “White girl wasted” Love it! Ooo ecstasy been awhile. Def hard to pass up free drugs lol.

    • Its the equivalent of someone paying for the majority or your drinks all night, or if its acid then its like they’ve paid for your drinks for 24 hrs πŸ˜€ Pretty sweet deal I say!

      Probably should add a public notice here:
      Drugs are bad mmmmkay. Nah jk, they’re alright πŸ™‚ just be safe about it peeps!

  2. Pingback: Cockblocked by a Ghost | Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

  3. Pingback: Shower thought of the day #8 | Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

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