Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

Rambling Goat and Nonsense Unicorn present… The Awesome Person's Guide to Life

Alternative names for ‘rude’ parts


Who uses the phrase mammory glands? Or perineum? (I actually had to google it to get the right spelling so obviously not me.. 😀

Here’s a delightful list of alternative words and phrases for your bits and bobs (most off the odd ones are courtesy of NU!), because medical terminology is laaame. Enjoy 😀

Vagina region:
*lady parts
*meat curtains
*axe wound
*man on a boat (the man is your clit)
*wet lettuce
*fur burger
*ham wallet
*treasure box (of awesomeness)

Gluteus maximus region:
*back door/entrance

*fun bags
*the girls
*Santa’s sacks

*mosquito bites

Penis region:
*block and tackle
*fun stick

(For more hilarious penis names, check out jblondie’s glorious post)

*doing the deed
*hanky panky
*honk honk
*roasting the broomstick
*making a meat sandwich
*squeaky squeaky (thanks to me involved in a squeaky bunk bed scenario and an awake NU in the room, whoops!)

What funny phrases do you use?

Rambling Goat


Author: ramblingg0at

Life loves to set me up for its own entertainment. But instead of me hiding these awkward moments, I plan on sharing them for my own (and possibly your) amusement. Now who's laughing, life?

19 thoughts on “Alternative names for ‘rude’ parts

  1. LMAO…omg…I used “peeny” with one of my exes. I can’t fucking even say it now or else I throw-up in my mouth a little bit. Also, I have just now deemed my chesticles “Santa’s Sacks” for the holidays. 🙂 So thanks for that one!

  2. Lol!

    Here are more that I’ve heard or used…

    Yoni, Cooch, Cookie, Vag, Vayjay

    Ass, Arse, Bottom, Heiney, Rear, Trunk

    Knockers, Hooters, Jugs, TaTas


    Penis Region:
    John Thomas, Schlong, Dong, Wang, One-Eyed Trouser Snake, Prick, Junk, Gear

    Making the beast with two backs
    Bump Uglies
    Getting laid
    Making It
    Riding the skin boat to tuna town (this one just cracks me up)

  3. Map of tasmania!! Vajayjay … pubis, mound, cunt… cunt is one of my favourite words of all time. I heart it. I’d hump it too if I could hump a word. But for now I’ll just keep humping the actual thing 😛

    My cousin if fond of who-ha but it makes me think of some kind of vibrator to be honest. There should be a vibrator named WHO-HA! YES!

  4. There are also the multitudes of sex act names.

  5. And that’s just in English

  6. Heat-seeking Moisture-missile

  7. Nate always calls sex “hopping on the good foot and doing the bad thing” and I’ve NEVER heard anyone else say it in my life.

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