Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

Rambling Goat and Nonsense Unicorn present… The Awesome Person's Guide to Life

Nonsense Review: Oil-based paint


Nonsense Unicorn has started a Review section to the blog, so here goes!


So I’m turning an old 1920s dressing table into a vanity for the bathroom. I made that decision when my Pinterest obsession coincided with my visit to a furniture auction yard a year or so back. Well I’m ready to create this vanity now and so here enters the oil-based primer paint. For those who know nothing about painting, primer is your white base coat before another white (or colour) coat.

Ok so the review. As paint, it goes alright. It goes on fine, sticks to whatever you’re painting and looks white like it should.

Its pretty stinky but hey, if you’re into inhalants, maybe that won’t be a bad thing for you. Personally, I was singing nonsense songs to my mum (bad for her) but that may have been due to my tired delirium or my alcoholic beverage (a tradie who is still working at 4:30pm is allowed a beer ok?).

It also turns your hands into sticky magnets, but seeing as I picked up spider web and stray dry paint flakes I’ll say this is probably a good thing (didn’t need to get a brush to wipe down some areas that were forgotten).

But the real problem with oil-based paints is the cleanup.

The directions read “Cleaning: Mineral Turpentine” aka Turps. No big deal, they make it sound pretty easy. I think they need to add a few more points under this cleaning heading. How about this:

Cleaning: Mineral Turpentine. Be warned that not only could your hands end up covered in white (like you’re wearing mime gloves), but also your tap, a patch of lawn and an innocent Centipede can possibly be coated in white paint.

FYI, I did try to rinse off the centipede with water but water doesn’t help with this paint. It actually makes everything stickier, so it became sticky like my hands were earlier and picked up a few objects on its quick flee away from me. That centipede is going to have a rough couple of days.

If that’s not enough drama, you’ll definitely stink of turps afterwards (even after a shower) and will most likely notice patches of paint on your skin long after you have put the Turps away.

The stupid part I should mention is that I’ve used this plenty of times before. In fact last time I got some in my hair and had to cut that chunk of hair out. I’m way too unprepared, clumsy and blasé to be using the stuff.

Thankfully water-based primer now exists but like the cheapskate I am, I will continue to use the rest of my oil-based primer until I’ve run out.

So use it if you dare (or if you’re not a complete awkward tard like me), otherwise look for a water based primer instead! You’ll be able to rinse your brushes and buckets easily and will exit the shower feeling fresh as a daisy!

Rambling Goat


Author: ramblingg0at

Life loves to set me up for its own entertainment. But instead of me hiding these awkward moments, I plan on sharing them for my own (and possibly your) amusement. Now who's laughing, life?

4 thoughts on “Nonsense Review: Oil-based paint

  1. haha…what an informative post! You’re too cute 😉

  2. Haha I have the funniest image in my head from this post like something out of Monty Python hahaha!

    Awesome review!

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