Turning Lamebos Into Rainbows

Rambling Goat and Nonsense Unicorn present… The Awesome Person's Guide to Life

Whyyy body, whyyy?

6 Comments

Using a vibrator while really needing to pee is kind of like farting whilst wearing no underwear and needing to crap. Its scary as fuck. Scary BUT I think i’ll do it anyway. I’m living on the edge this week!

And i’ve also concluded I could never be a princess. Apparently you have to be prim and proper for that. I don’t think excessive beer drinking, Xbox playing (I’m still addicted to GTA5), vibrator use, open relationships with a member of royalty, filthy talk and sending photos of my gstring-clad butt to people would be allowed. Can I even wear sneakers?! Fuuuck what a life (or lack thereof). Maybe I could infiltrate the system, pretending I’m all prim and proper, then get a tat on my butt saying ‘just kidding, lols’ and moon everyone from a balcony.

And that’s a prime example of why I’m ‘rambling’. As for the goat part, well, I have an obsession with hooves. Not even kidding. See my phobias post here, it should help explain that.

What was I even saying..? Whatevs.

Rambling Goat

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Author: ramblingg0at

Life loves to set me up for its own entertainment. But instead of me hiding these awkward moments, I plan on sharing them for my own (and possibly your) amusement. Now who's laughing, life?

6 thoughts on “Whyyy body, whyyy?

  1. dirty is best….every fucking time!!

  2. I’ve been told squirting feels like having to pee, which is why I’ve never squirted. And masturbating while feeling I have to pee is as bad as running and needing to pee.
    I also want an open relationship with a member of royalty. Is there a RoyalsMeetPeasants.com?

    • Haha no but there should be! I’d love to date/corrupt a princess 😉 meow! But that’s going to be even harder I suspect. Unless there’s a lesbianprincessesrus.com

      Yeah my friend knew a girl that was a squirter so I got him to ask her how she gets to that point to see if I’m capable. She said ‘if you’ve had plenty of good sex then you’ll know if you’re a squirter or not’. So you’ve either got it or you don’t. Feeling like you’re pissing wouldn’t be the greatest but being able to squirt would be awesome! Shoot them in the face! Hahahahaha

  3. Lol I love it… You sure do live on the edge!!!

  4. I need to learn how to squirt darn it…..

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