Using a vibrator while really needing to pee is kind of like farting whilst wearing no underwear and needing to crap. Its scary as fuck. Scary BUT I think i’ll do it anyway. I’m living on the edge this week!
And i’ve also concluded I could never be a princess. Apparently you have to be prim and proper for that. I don’t think excessive beer drinking, Xbox playing (I’m still addicted to GTA5), vibrator use, open relationships with a member of royalty, filthy talk and sending photos of my gstring-clad butt to people would be allowed. Can I even wear sneakers?! Fuuuck what a life (or lack thereof). Maybe I could infiltrate the system, pretending I’m all prim and proper, then get a tat on my butt saying ‘just kidding, lols’ and moon everyone from a balcony.
And that’s a prime example of why I’m ‘rambling’. As for the goat part, well, I have an obsession with hooves. Not even kidding. See my phobias post here, it should help explain that.
What was I even saying..? Whatevs.