So as I was googling ‘are modern humans more intelligent than cave people?’ (My dad thinks we aren’t cos we don’t invent anything from nothing, they’re all inventions from adding knowledge to older inventions) and drinking beer out of a mug (where the fuck are all my cups?! I’d drink it out of the bottle if it was glass, but its those home brew brown plastic bottles..) and I started questioning butt plugs. Look, I get distracted pretty easily, totally normal.
So what the FUCK is up with butt plugs? Not sure why you’d want to cork your butt up, it’s not a bottle of wine. And if it was it’d be a shit one (haha! Oh man, so lame..).
And while I’m on the shoving-things-up-your-arse topic, what the fuck is up with anal beads? Is that not just like shitting out nuggets? I had a schnitzel the other day and got that feeling the next day for FREE. And it didn’t make me horny. It made me check the bowl and think wtf. I felt like some tiny sparrow and the toilet bowl was my nest. So is it wrong of me to put anal beads and poop fetish in the same category?
Please note that I’m pretty ignorant on the whole topic, but feel free to tell me what I’m missing here. Anyone that knows/uses/enjoys/understands them, enlighten me. Or I’m going to be forced to buy some and test them out. Then try to send them back for a refund hahaha!
Edit: So I bought a buttplug. And now have 3. One vibrates. So ok I get it, BUT who was the first person to jam something up there and go “ok that feels good, I’ll just leave that there for a while now..” Was it a caveman? With a stick? So I’m still confused about their existence (and lolling at the wine bottle reference) but hey, I’m just rollin’ with it.